Sunday, November 27, 2011


Usually a time arrives, in our lives, when we realize saying whatever about others in a bad way has negative repercussions.  For some individuals, they never seem to advance to this stage in life.  They do not recognize the negativity coming from their lips hurts not only them, but those they speak of. 

The most amazing thing is when widows gossip about widows.  Yet then, why would I be surprised over such an event?  What you were before you became a widow (er) only lies dormant until you allow it to make its way to the surface.

Don't get me wrong, it isn't as if I have never gossiped before.  It is very easy to get wrapped up into something you shouldn't or have no right to.  This is human nature.  The wonderful fact about human nature is it can be manipulated by our own will.  So that which we do not like or bad habits we have can be changed.  Lovely isn't it?

Defining lines as to what is gossip and what is not bears great anxiety for some of us.  We need to visit.  We need to laugh.  Unfortunately sometimes it is at someone's expense.  As awful as it sounds, this is actually quite normal.  Did I say normal?  Remind me not to do that again.  Let me say, human nature.  Its a natural response in communicating.

What is not natural, and is what I would consider in poor taste, is adding snooping to gossip.  Snooping as in taking measures to intrude on the privacy of others with the sole reason to have something to talk about.  This is when it has breached the natural human nature response and gravitates into the malicious state.  Hence, we now have a poor case of malicious gossip.

Consider this, if I left my cell phone at your house, would you go through my texts to find out what I was talking about and to whom?  Sure, it would be tempting (human nature), but a majority of us would not.  We have the ability to articulate that which we know is right vs. wrong, ethical vs. unethical or moral vs. immoral.  Just because you can and have the control to, doesn't necessarily mean it is right to do.  Alright, so that is a clear example.  If we note such things coming to the surface after our loved ones have left;  chances are it was a pre-existing condition.

As tragic and terrible as our lives have been, due to the death of our loved one, wouldn't it makes sense to pick up the pieces?  We have the opportunity to notice both negative and positive qualities because we can focus on ourselves now.  Not that any of us chose this, but it does exist now.  If we see serious negative behavior surfacing, perhaps now is the time to focus on it and make it go away.  I say serious because truly to be human it involves negative and positive.  It takes a great deal of patience with trial and error to change ourselves, but I am here to say, it can be done. 

So here I am with a challenge for you and for myself.  Now that we are forced to focus on ourselves, we might as well change a few damaging habits we see surfacing.  I wonder how many will, or have, taken this challenge in their life when they have the opportunity to?

1 comment:

  1. Nice post Robin. Wonderful reminder for us all. :)


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