Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Ready, Set, Go!

All that I have been through, and my very being being raked over shards of glass...finally it's happened.  I ran into a situation, where the person tried to run me over glass again cause they saw my healing.  My personal power coming into being again.  This time I approached it wisely.  My old self. :)  
I couldn't be happier.  I guess enjoying the Wicked Tinkers, and Late Husband's growing up has affected me in a positive way.  I have been sticking to my goal, which I did write down and hang up to remind me, and it is really helping.  
The other event in my life is I joined up with a place called "Widowed Village."   I wish I had known about this place a few years back.  So please, check this place out.  Kind considerate and people like us to visit with.  Laughter and tears, and advice.  So beautiful.

You see the faerie and one of her wings are clipped.  Well, have hope my widowed friends.  My wings that were clipped so brutally by emotional vampirism, are actually healing.  I grow my wings as my husband matured this year.  Suddenly I realize, okay, lets grow them wings.  This was our plan, and there is no reason I can't continue with the plan I start so long ago with him.  I just have to wing it alone.
I am pounding the streets looking for a job.  One of the things I had always wanted to do and we were going to do together was go commercial fishing.  I met up with whom I thought I could trust and after spending a great deal of money, cleaning engine room, and did ALL the major hard work...He said I was too old to fish.  I was heartbroken.  This was, and has been the pulling at my heart.  To at least find out if I have it.

Yesterday speaking with those on the docks who know me, I found...they knew what he was doing.  So everyone is trying to help me find something so I can at least give it a try.  This encouragement was so exciting!

Hence the "Protector of the mother" had to step in when he caught wind of it.  Yes, its dangerous for a female to go out.  Once at sea, if the person you are with says you have to do something unscrupulous, what can you do?  So now all is good!  The deal is, when I have an offer, I have a list of incredibly experienced individuals who will do the safety checks on the person for me!  This time, I am using my head.  I had some good long talks to folks yesterday.   They pointed out exactly what I did wrong.  What he did was wrong, but he's not the first, but lets make it the last!  

I am pursueing other avenues as well, but my heart is so very much tugging and has been many a year.  My late husband was a fisherman, as my son is now.  I have been told, I am not too old, in fact preferred for my age because I can cook, clean fish, and navigate.  PLUS, I am mature enough to listen and do what I am told.

Please everyone, hold you hopes up high for me.  I need this for my confidence and to do this for my heart.  I need to go fishing.  I miss it terribly.  

Meanwhile, it is time for me to continue ridding my home of unnecessary items so I can move on with my plan.

Have a beautiful day everyone.  
She's not so crazy after all!
Just had the wrong friends.

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